Monday, October 4, 2010

What do you really need to say?

When coaching a client, whether it is in person or by phone, the place most of them get stuck, is not communicating what they really need to say. You may wonder why that’s so difficult and how can you improve at communicating with others? Well, you know that old saying “let it begin with me.” Get out a sheet of paper and be an objective observer, ask yourself what is holding you back? In the past, clients have shared with me that when they give themselves time to sort their thoughts out on paper, they are usually very surprised that their lack of communication has to do with them not saying what they truly want or need. So, how can we make this process less painful and recognize this quicker?

Here are 3 tips that may help you get there:
  1. Are you saying a lot of coulda, woulda, shoulda's? If so, you may need to first get honest with yourself. It is not just what you say; it is how you say it. 
  2. Say it with confidence, that you and the person can work out what you are going through.
  3. Last but not least, stop making excuses and get off your b-u-t-s! This is a sure way to notice you are placing blame or trying to justifying your need to be right, instead of just getting to the root of the issue.

If you are looking for a way to better communicate, call me today and set up a complimentary wellness coaching call! We can always unlearn and relearn new ways to communicate.